We moved and all is well on the farm. We don't have internet yet though, so we'll continue to be out of touch for a while. It's been pretty nice being unplugged in the middle of nowhere. It's really beautiful here.
It was a crazy move. We somehow managed to time it perfectly with Zander's first molars. It was intense.
More later...
March 27, 2013
February 27, 2013
a home
It's been seven months since we left the farm. Seven long months spent searching for a new farm. In that time, I must say that sadly, we've become disheartened with Pennsylvania and what it's people are willing to do to it's land and water. Such beautiful farmland ruined, or signed away to be ruined someday soon. The Marcellus shale gas issue has hit us hard and has really begun to discourage us from this area.
For the first time since we started this farming adventure, we've found ourselves considering relocating. It's freeing to think that we can go anywhere we want and we're entertaining ideas as wild as Oregon, California or even Chile or Costa Rica. All of our family is here, though, so it's not a decision to take lightly. And while we're making such huge decisions, we've been wondering what we should do in the meantime. We thought of looking for places to rent in the city but that just didn't feel right. That's not where we belong or where we want to be. And of course, what would we do with all of our farm stuff?
And then it happened. Serendipity stepped in once again. We reconnected with an old acquaintance at just the right time and before we knew it, our problems were solved. We've found a place to live, on a farm, where we can take our time, do some farming, travel to research other areas and continue to search for the right place for us. This means that we don't have to watch a season go by without growing some food and we can immerse our son in the kind of life we want him to experience.
A home! It may be temporary, as we may decide to move somewhere else after this season, or we may love it and choose to stay. But it's our very own space to live and grow in and it's just what we need right now.
We're so grateful.
For the first time since we started this farming adventure, we've found ourselves considering relocating. It's freeing to think that we can go anywhere we want and we're entertaining ideas as wild as Oregon, California or even Chile or Costa Rica. All of our family is here, though, so it's not a decision to take lightly. And while we're making such huge decisions, we've been wondering what we should do in the meantime. We thought of looking for places to rent in the city but that just didn't feel right. That's not where we belong or where we want to be. And of course, what would we do with all of our farm stuff?
And then it happened. Serendipity stepped in once again. We reconnected with an old acquaintance at just the right time and before we knew it, our problems were solved. We've found a place to live, on a farm, where we can take our time, do some farming, travel to research other areas and continue to search for the right place for us. This means that we don't have to watch a season go by without growing some food and we can immerse our son in the kind of life we want him to experience.
A home! It may be temporary, as we may decide to move somewhere else after this season, or we may love it and choose to stay. But it's our very own space to live and grow in and it's just what we need right now.
We're so grateful.
January 24, 2013
wide awake
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| the oven at Wide Awake Bakery |
This past weekend the three of us took a road trip to New York where Nate attended a wood-fired baking course. The course was sponsored by OGRIN and took place at Wide Awake Bakery, a bakery with good people and an amazing oven. The majority of the grains used at the bakery are locally grown and milled and the course was primarily about how to bake with these local grains. It was great to get out of town and Nate made some good contacts and learned a ton of valuable information.
There are lots of small farms in the area and there's a really nice vibe there. The kind of vibe we haven't felt in a while. I'm not saying we're destined to farm in New York, but for the first time we're beginning to wonder if we belong here.
This is quite possibly the scariest time in our lives as we consider our future. Stress and worry have been a big part of our days and nights lately and I've been thinking a lot about that. We only get one life. Just one. And that sure seems like a deary and wasteful way to spend it?
We've been given a chance to start again and I have no idea where this will take us. I'm trying to stay open. I hope it involves farming, but I know it will involve a wood-fired oven.
January 4, 2013
he walks
Right now, I am. . .
~ preparing myself to never sit down again. At least not for the next year or so.
~ so thankful that Nate and I were both here for this moment.
~ shedding a tear or two because my baby is growing so fast. We have a toddler!
~ trying to just breathe and enjoy this moment.
~ so incredibly proud of my boy!
December 29, 2012
home
It was November 29, 2006. Nate had been living in England, where he was transferred for work, for almost a year. He and I were best friends until a certain beach trip showed us that we were destined to be more. After not even a year of 'dating', when Nate moved away, we decided to just see what happened. We both figured it was over and planned to move on with our lives, separately. We were surprised, however, to find that we each felt incomplete without the other. We continued our relationship online. It was a hard year and I was lucky enough to visit him there twice.
On that night in November, during one of our daily Skype sessions, Nate asked me to marry him. We both agreed that we didn't want to live apart anymore. It was an exciting time for us. We had a month to plan something, as he would be coming home for a visit over christmas. We opted for a very small family gathering at my mother's home where we were married just after christmas. A week later, I kissed my new husband goodbye as he left to return to the UK while I packed up my life here and made plans to join him.
We lived in a sweet little coach house that was part of a large estate. It was the first time we'd ever lived together and we made it a home. As that first year drew to a close, we made the decision to return to America to start a farm. We didn't know how we would do it but we felt it deep within ourselves as something we were meant to do. So, we came home.
Four months later we found an awesome farming situation which enabled us to get our feet wet on someone else's farm while we learned all we could. This was an amazing opportunity because we didn't have to buy a farm and could take our time searching for the right place once we were ready. We rented the house next door which couldn't have been more perfect for us. It was as if we lived right there, on the farm. We set up shop and got to work farming.
After a year, our landlord told us he needed us to move out so he could renovate the house to put on the market. We moved into a 27 foot camper, parked on the farm, for five months so we could finish out the season with all of our animals. That farm was for sale as the owners had purchased a larger farm in search of more grass for their growing herd of cattle. This meant we had to move on and, well, you know the rest of it.
I'll make this very long story short. If you had told me six years ago that we would become 'nomadic farmers' for the next few years, I would never have believed you. That''s just not the life for me, I would have thought. I need to feel grounded and have some roots. But, you do what you have to do and you become acclimated to the new normal. And so, that's what we did.
Our journey to find the right farm has been long, bumpy and paved with beauty, love and a whole lot of learning. And it's far from over. This trip down memory lane is all to say that aside from our year in England and our year living next to the first farm in 2008, Nate and I have not had a home that's been ours. We've not been able to feel settled or put down roots.
This is a really strange and difficult time for my little family. We have no regrets about anything we've done, or the choices we've made. We're very grateful to have a safe and warm place to stay right now, but we want a home. For the second time in just a few years, all of our belongings sit in storage waiting for us. Our larger farm stuff still sits with no place to move it to. We're feeling so displaced and to be honest, we're losing our freaking minds. We just don't belong here. We belong on a farm, tired to the bone, overworked, with dirt under our fingernails.
In a way, this time is a gift. Time for us to be helping to take care of both of our mothers when they need us most. Time for Zander to be with family. Time we wouldn't normally have to bond with our son. And time for us to catch our breath and take care of our bodies.
But it's not what we want or what feeds our souls. There is much stress, many tears, and a lot of hoping. It's time for some roots.
Still searching, still waiting. Though I have no doubt this is all happening for a reason, it's still hard.
Now more than ever, we need to find our home.
On that night in November, during one of our daily Skype sessions, Nate asked me to marry him. We both agreed that we didn't want to live apart anymore. It was an exciting time for us. We had a month to plan something, as he would be coming home for a visit over christmas. We opted for a very small family gathering at my mother's home where we were married just after christmas. A week later, I kissed my new husband goodbye as he left to return to the UK while I packed up my life here and made plans to join him.
We lived in a sweet little coach house that was part of a large estate. It was the first time we'd ever lived together and we made it a home. As that first year drew to a close, we made the decision to return to America to start a farm. We didn't know how we would do it but we felt it deep within ourselves as something we were meant to do. So, we came home.
Four months later we found an awesome farming situation which enabled us to get our feet wet on someone else's farm while we learned all we could. This was an amazing opportunity because we didn't have to buy a farm and could take our time searching for the right place once we were ready. We rented the house next door which couldn't have been more perfect for us. It was as if we lived right there, on the farm. We set up shop and got to work farming.
After a year, our landlord told us he needed us to move out so he could renovate the house to put on the market. We moved into a 27 foot camper, parked on the farm, for five months so we could finish out the season with all of our animals. That farm was for sale as the owners had purchased a larger farm in search of more grass for their growing herd of cattle. This meant we had to move on and, well, you know the rest of it.
I'll make this very long story short. If you had told me six years ago that we would become 'nomadic farmers' for the next few years, I would never have believed you. That''s just not the life for me, I would have thought. I need to feel grounded and have some roots. But, you do what you have to do and you become acclimated to the new normal. And so, that's what we did.
Our journey to find the right farm has been long, bumpy and paved with beauty, love and a whole lot of learning. And it's far from over. This trip down memory lane is all to say that aside from our year in England and our year living next to the first farm in 2008, Nate and I have not had a home that's been ours. We've not been able to feel settled or put down roots.
This is a really strange and difficult time for my little family. We have no regrets about anything we've done, or the choices we've made. We're very grateful to have a safe and warm place to stay right now, but we want a home. For the second time in just a few years, all of our belongings sit in storage waiting for us. Our larger farm stuff still sits with no place to move it to. We're feeling so displaced and to be honest, we're losing our freaking minds. We just don't belong here. We belong on a farm, tired to the bone, overworked, with dirt under our fingernails.
In a way, this time is a gift. Time for us to be helping to take care of both of our mothers when they need us most. Time for Zander to be with family. Time we wouldn't normally have to bond with our son. And time for us to catch our breath and take care of our bodies.
But it's not what we want or what feeds our souls. There is much stress, many tears, and a lot of hoping. It's time for some roots.
Still searching, still waiting. Though I have no doubt this is all happening for a reason, it's still hard.
Now more than ever, we need to find our home.
December 19, 2012
December 17, 2012
the party
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| photo by Andy Johanson |
We had a birthday party for Zander last weekend. I made "Gracie's Yellow Birthday Cake" from this book for him to eat and it was fantastic. Daddy made a banner, I made way too much food and Zander was surrounded by the people who love him. It was a good day.
Z got a little overwhelmed by all the people singing to him, the flaming cupcake, and the lack of nap. But he quickly recovered and enjoyed the cake.
A good time was had by all. My baby isn't much of a baby anymore.
Sigh.
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